Inside The Mind Of A Boy Mum/Mom

So I’ve had the pleasure of collaborating with the beautiful Mannie Nanni and her gorgeous little boy Adam on my latest post! Ive had so much fun working with her to put this blog post together and I think it’s one that so many boy moms/mums can relate to.

If you want to see more of the lovely Mannie please follow her on Instagram at: www.instagram.com/relissacharae

It’s crazy to think I’m a boy mum of two!! I always imagined myself having a little boy and a mini version of me with perfectly matching nails, going on Shopping dates and girly adventures.. Instead, I am standing at the side of a football pitch freezing my butt off thinking “Is this life”. Haha! That being said I am both my sons biggest cheerleader and they make me so unbelievably proud. Nearly 4 years into being a boy mum I honestly wouldn’t have it any other way.. boys are extremely loving! And you cant beat conversations with a 3 year old who wants to celebrate his willies birthday because it “Growed” a bit. 😂😂

However, I will always consider what it would be like to be the mother of the bride, the realisation that I may never get to be a birthing partner to a “daughter” and one day when I am old to do anything who will wipe my butt and tie my hair up for me. But most importantly I hope that in a world where men are expected to be as hard as steel, my boys will always feel they can talk to Mummy about their troubles.

OK , so my kids are 3 and 3 months old! BUT I can’t be the only boy mum that has thought about these things! It’s not quite the same being the mother of the groom! I would’ve loved to have had that rush of emotion when I saw my daughter in a beautiful white dress as she prepared for the biggest day of her life.. instead I will be sat in “anticipation” as my son walks out the fitting room in a suit that looks exactly the same as the the last 5 he tried on but in a different colour.

I wonder if my daughter in laws will want to have me in the birthing suite when they give birth or if I will be that Grandmother sitting outside in the waiting room, listening anxiously for the cries of my precious grand-child. Honestly, I long for a good relationship with my daughter in laws. I hope to be some one they can look up to and confide in. I only hope that they’re not total bitches and my son has good taste in women haha!

I bet I sound so harsh right now! But this is in the mind of a boy mum so I have to be honest!

Finally, as a man I honestly feel that there is so much pressure on them, to be the bread winner, to protect their family and to be a macho man. Although I will raise both of my sons to provide for their family and stand on their own two feet. I really hope that my sons never feel that weight of the world on their shoulders and that they have emotionally strong women to pick them up when they are down. Because the truth is I won’t always be around.

Mannie, since you had your little man 7 months ago.. What are the things that go through your mind as boy mom?

“Do I really wish I had a girl like everyone asks me even though I say no? Who am I raising my son to take care of and love when he becomes an adult? Am I hurting my son’s privates when I hold him on my leg or hip? Is it just me or is the girl’s clothes section WAY bigger than the boy’s section?

Welcome to our male dominated World! Let’s start with the first question we constantly ask ourselves. Do I really wish I had a girl like everyone asks me even though I say no? At least for me, deep down inside, I always knew I was destined to be a boy mom. I am adventurous in spirit and I just always had this feeling that I was being prepared to raise a boy. So when I heard the news that I was having a boy I was naturally thrilled!

Who am I raising my son to take care of and love when he becomes an adult? From the moment I felt him alive and kicking in my stomach, I began thinking about the woman that he may someday be going on this journey of giving birth with. How he would treat her and take care of her. I immediately felt an obligation to show him how to stand by a strong independent woman, and how to support and love her for who she is.

Am I hurting my son’s privates when I hold him on my leg or hip? While I don’t have pediatric confirmation of this, I have convinced myself this is a solid no, and that baby boys are strong dudes. Feel free to enlighten me here, but I hold my son for the most part as if he were a girl in multiple different positions. Although every once in a while my brain sneaks in a questioning thought as to whether he is in pain, but then my little guy gives me a reassuring smile, and my mind is again at peace.

Is it just me or is the girl’s clothing section way bigger than the boys?? You really don’t start to notice this until, you have a to dress a boy. Although every time, I walk in to a store my mind immediately goes into shock mode at the fact that there are 500 super cute girly items while the boys have about 10 pieces which mainly say “cool dude”. And then disappointment sets in, and like a superwoman in the night, my mind immediately rescues me and says, That means more for us girlfriend!” (Mannie Nanni, guest blogger)

Mothers, tell us what goes through your mind as a boy Mum/Mom. We’d love to hear your thoughts.. ❤️

OMG! I have kids, my life is over

“Apparently your life stops when you have kids”

If I had a £1 for every time someone said to me “ohhh you best have all your fun before you have kids”. Or “you can’t do that you have two children now” I would be a rich mofo sitting in a gigantic castle bathing in champagne. Honestly the ignorance and tunnel vision of some people is barbaric.

I told some one that I had plans to go on holiday, their reply “With your kids, good luck”. Now these types of comments only serve to inspire me more to achieve everything I wish in life with my two gorgeous boys right by my side.

NEWS FLASH MAMA’S: Your life is not over because you’ve had children, in-fact your life is just beginning.

When I was pregnant with my first I was completely oblivious to what was to come and it’s crazy that I actually started to believe everything the “Debbie Downers” told me, so much so that I was quite down in my first/second trimester of my first pregnancy. I was a 22 year old girl who was just starting out in life.. drowned with thoughts and anxieties that this baby would act as a complete burden on my life.

Now I’m here to tell you, that although my life has totally transformed with two children, in that my house never stays tidy, I constantly have a headache, I’m constantly picking up mini boxers and I’m accustomed to conversations about willies and poo. I am able to pamper myself, go on girly outings, have date nights, leave the house (after 4 hours of getting the boys ready😂), I’m able to get my eyebrows done and have me time.

Because the truth is self-care is so extremely important. Looking after yourself is looking after your kids. Now this may sound completely controversial, but when I hear parents say. “Aslong as my kids have everything, I don’t care about myself”. I completely disagree. Why should you now neglect yourself because you have children?

Now right now I sound like a complete hypocrite as I treated myself to 4 tops and a pair of jeans today and had a complete meltdown so I ended up spending loads on my kids to counteract the guilt! But honestly this is a cycle that both you and I have to break!! I was never like this with my first child but with child number two I have suffered what they called “Mum guilt” however I’m currently approaching the phase of “fuck this sh%t “I’m going to buy those shoes! What’s the worst that can happen..

I understand that some people do really struggle with the concept of having children and how much responsibility these little humans are (who don’t come with a damn manual) and it can be so overwhelming in the early stages.. I was someone who suffered with baby blues/borderline post natal depression. However it’s like with anything you have to allow time to adjust, and get to know these little people, it’s like blind dating! (OR CATFISH IF YOU EXPECT A BABY WHO IS WELL BEHAVED AND SLEEPS THROUGH THE NIGHT BUT INSTEAD YOU GET A KID WHO SCREAMS WHEN YOU LOOK AT THEM). I digress 😂

But honestly, a lot of people say to me “I don’t think I’m ready to have a child” my advice is you will never be 100% ready but you adjust and make it work.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Our kids should serve as our motivation to want more from life not spell the end of it. Buy those shoes, book that holiday and most of all!! FORGET WHAT OTHER PEOPLE SAY! Because none of those people are feeding , clothing or housing you or your children.

With Love From P ❤️

Who am I

Dear diary,

So who am I? I asked some of my closest friends and family to describe me in a few words as I found this question quite difficult.. amongst many words I was described as, a control freak, stubborn, selfless, wise, supportive, inspirational and “weirdly masculine” yes you heard right weirdly masculine.. don’t really know what to make of that but moving on swiftly!

Where do I start? (From the beginning I guess). Let me start by letting you know that I am by no means an expert at writing! However, I’ve been been on maternity leave with my second son for around 6 weeks and whilst off I’ve been looking for blogs and vlogs that I can sink my teeth into to help me overcome this daunting time that is the transition from one to two kids.. and how to look half decent while trying to conquer such a mission lol so far I’ve failed miserably! Whilst I have found some amazing vlogs and a couple of blogs I thought I would have a go at this blog stuff and share snippets of my crazy life trying to take over the world (with two kids in tow LOL, this should be fun).

So you have an idea of the kind of topics I will delve into on my blog I just want to give you a little “blurb” about my life! I’m a 27 year old city girl and a mother of two, to a crazy 3 year old who is currently going through the “I’m right your wrong stage” and a 6 week old baby boy who has literally arrived and taken over the whole household with what we call the enemy of motherhood COLIC (I’ll save that story for another day). While being a mother of two gorgeous boys I work full time in the Criminal Justice System, maintain a home (well at least try LOL) and have a fiancé who I’ve been engaged to for 7 years (ages I know again that’s a story for another day LOL). I’m a fun loving girl who loves to be pampered, go on girly dinner dates, shop and have a gossip over a glass of baileys, which I feel at times has been the topic of conversation amongst other mothers who feel I should be at home 24/7 baking cakes and never leaving my house unless I am with my children! Firstly, NO! I am a mother first, however I am an individual who deserves and insists on having me time, as should every other mother to prevent insanity haha! (Again I go off track lol). So to save us all some time I would like to list some of the stuff that is close to my heart that I will be blogging about, Motherhood, transition from one to two, how I juggle my career, family and fiancé, relationships, girl talk, stereotypes, fashion and style!

So I suppose you’re probably wondering the type of people I will be able to relate to during my dear diary journey (If anyone LOL). I would say, young mothers although I’m not super young I would consider myself still 18 in spirit! Working mothers, career driven women, mothers to be, those who are starting out in life with families, mortgages, Independecy and financial aspects of life and finally those who love to live and live to love!

I highly encourage comments, suggestions and questions from my readers as it helps me to get to know what you all like to read and whether I am talking complete nonsense ha-ha!

Can’t wait to start my journey with you all.. And connect with likewise women for a chin wag haha!!

With Love From P