Little book of empowerment

Since starting my blogging journey I have met some absolutely amazingly strong and courageous women with inspirational stories! Not only that, In my personal life I’m surrounded by phenomenal, inspirational and motivational women, despite what they go through they always come out on top. I have been so empowered by others, that it’s only right that I give something back.

A Message to the woman who is battling an illness or mental health condition.

Yes you are strong, yes you are resilient and you’re so capable of overcoming anything which life throws at you. But you’re also human. It’s ok to say, I’m not ok! It’s ok to scream “I need help”. I have suffered with anxiety, I battled with depression! I’m living proof that you can overcome it! There are days when getting out of bed is a struggle.. communicating your feelings seems pointless. There are days when putting a brave face on for your children or the world becomes to draining.

You have tried tirelessly to keep it to yourself because the stigma attached to mental health is both ignorant and so far from the truth. Enough is enough, it’s time for us to support each other through these chapters of our lives, it’s time to talk. #WomenSupportingWomen.

Not only have I battled my own demons I have been on the receiving end of some one close taking their own life because they couldn’t see the way out of the storm. This woman will NOT be you! We are here for you, we care about and we LOVE you. Ladies please check on your close ones. Because the truth is, everyone is going through something.

A Message to the single mother.

To the strong and amazing single mother. You most likely didn’t choose to be a single mother and go it alone. However you put your you and child first and this is the path it has lead you to. Some days you may think you’re losing the will to live and the responsibility of being a mother and father can be overwhelming. But you push for greatness everyday because you look at your children and all you want is the best. You’re the strongest of us all. You’re selfless and courageous, you made a commitment to dedicate every inch of yourself to your child. There are many times you compromise your own happiness to ensure that your child does not feel that they’re any less due to an absent parent. I have a cousin and a best friend who are both single mothers and they are phenomenal, they’re my super heroes. One of the questions my best friend always asks Is will my child’s development suffer because of an absent parent.. My answer is no!! As a children’s services practitioner I can tell you that as long as a child has one positive attachment with a parent or cater who offers them love, nurturing and consistency, the child will be destined for greatness.

Single mothers you’re total Bosses!! There are times that I’m on the brink of a melt down and my partner comes to the rescue to help. So when I think of all the mothers that have 100% responsibility for their children I find it completely inspirational. You are so so so appreciated and recognised.

A Message to the working mother (mompreneur)

I am the working mother. Working mums we get judged for leaving or children to go to work. In my case I leave my children in childcare to help other children who have lived a life of abuse, and disadvantage.

I know you feel guilty when you pick your child up and they’ve achieved a milestone that you were unable to witness yourself. I know you feel guilty that you carried this child for 9 months and now some one else spends full days with them while you work for a better life for your children. I know that everyday you second guess whether you’ve made the right decision. You’re torn, you want to provide the best life for your child so you work hard, but you also accept that time is precious. We know that Mum guilt is a prominent emotion that runs through our body on a daily basis. We know that we are drained as we enter the house for our “second shift” maintaining a home, interacting with your child, and cooking dinner after an emotional day at work.

Just remember as working mothers we serve a purpose.. we are the nurses in the hospital helping our children and loved ones. We are the professionals that leave our children to help other children who are in need. We are the nursery nurses, we are the teachers, we are the entrepreneurs building solid foundations for our children’s future. We ARE Mum Bosess. When you’re feeling down always remember who you’re doing it for .

A Message to the woman who has been, emotionally and physically abused.

To the woman who may not be free or recently freed from an abusive relationship. DO NOT listen to what he says, you’re beautiful, you’re courageous! It’s not your fault. He is controlling because he realises your are stronger than him. He knows that when you realise your worth you will be gone forever. You’re way more than he tells you you are. You’re a diamond waiting to shine bright, you’re that flower waiting to open.. you’re that woman who is going to find her inner peace.

You would be surprised how many woman, are living your exact story as we speak. You’re not alone. There are so many ‘compatriots’ that are living in this temporary chapter. However the loneliness and isolation has made you feel that you’re the only one in the whole world riding out this storm. There are a tribe of people waiting, and ready to help, empower and support you through. Please speak out, find your voice, please seek help!

This happens to the strongest of women and I think that this is a big misconception! “You should have been stronger” or “you should have just left him” it’s so much easier said than done! I feel that people are so ignorant when it comes to this topic, people only consider the physical side and totally dismiss the control, manipulation and coercion that accompanies it.

Strong woman, there is a better life waiting for you!

A Message to the single woman.

I know there are nights that going to bed alone is overwhelming and you feel that you will never find your soulmate. I know that you get to a point that you feel you’ve kissed so many frogs but are still yet to find “The One”. And I know there have been times that you have looked to yourself and thought you’re the reason why you can’t find love “maybe I’m too picky”, “maybe I’m not good enough”.

You’re NOT picky, you’re a strong ass woman who brings so much to the table and loves so deeply that she is not willing to compromise her morals or self worth for any man. It would be so easy for you to “make do” and settle with a man just to fill that void, but you haven’t, this is why you’re so strong and courageous, you realise that who ever comes into your life must add value. Particularly those who have children, you’re wary of who you bring around your child so tread with caution.

Beautiful woman.. timing is everything. And I want you to know as a woman who is in a relationship, all that glitters is not gold! You watch all your friends get engaged and have kids, you see a fairytale but you never really know what challenges their relationship maybe facing. Do not compare yourself! When your time comes, your soul mate will love you deeply and you will realise that all the “Frog kissing” was worth it.

Just remember, you are amazing because you have established a relationship with yourself before meeting the love of your life. You know yourself and you love yourself.

To the woman who has lost a partner

I know there are no words that can console you or make you feel any better. I know you have received countless messages of condolence, gifts, flowers, hugs and cards. Although you accept these with appreciation. They only provide you with temporary comfort. Death can feel like a thief of happiness and memories, and each day you wake up asking yourself “why me?”. You expect to wake up and see your partner, lying next to you. It’s ok that you feel feel angry, sad , guilty, frustrated and often start to question the meaning of life.

I have a cousin who has recently lost her partner who left behind their son who is 4 years old. Every single day she strives for better. Her ethos for carrying on “I need to make him proud”

To those who have lost, a partner, a husband a fiancé I promise you’re not alone in the struggle, your loved ones are there for you, they care and they deeply love you. Your angel is watching over you through all of your lifetime ventures. Although you feel alone, they are with you, through your rainy days and your happiest days.

Please don’t feel guilty or have regrets, you have the most amazing memories that you can cherish forever, hold on tight to those photos, that top they used to wear, and smile while you relive the amazing memories you created.

A Message to the stay at home mothers (SAHM) mothers.

Stay at home mothers, you are the chef, the house keeper, nurse, the therapist, the chauffeur, the teacher. I know that your days seem long yet your nights so short. I know that you never really “switch off” because you’re on job 24/7. I know that there are times when you’re defending your role as a SAHM mother even to those who are closest to you. Sometimes even our partners can’t understand what we do all day. I say we because I am currently on maternity leave and through this experience I have a new found respect and admiration for you.

I’m in total awe of you, you’re amazing. There are so many stereotypes that suggest that SAHM mothers do not do anything. However I’m here to tell you that being a stay at home mother can be more difficult than being in employment. You have to be creative, patient, remain positive, and be organised. It’s not easy. YOU’RE SELF-LESS. Time is so precious, you’re able to witness all the milestones, the first steps, first laugh, riding a bike. We blink and our babies are no longer reliant upon us. So I wholeheartedly respect your decision to dedicate all your time to those babies that you’ve carried for 9 months. I know it can get lonely and draining.. But life as a SAHM is one of, if not the most rewarding job you will ever have.

What is it like being a stay at home mother: “The most hectic, fast paced, fun filled, tiring, lonely, rewarding job you could ever have”. (Katie, A SAHM)

WOMEN, TOGETHER WE STAND ❤️